Splice Movies T.W.A.T.

Weekend Movies T.W.A.T. Good Friday Special

T.W.A.T. means to watch avec telly. This is the Spice Guide to whats on telly thats filmy. Read it and post some comments, what you watched, what you didnt, tell me to stop posting thins crap, your choice.

Avec means "with" i know that but rather than "on" and make it T.W.O.T. its T.W.A.T. cos its aesthetically more pleasing.Another weekend has rolled itself around so here is where to find out what is coming up on the telly if your staying in. Or rather you could probably check the papers too, they have the tv listings, yeah! But it doesnt have the same spin on it you will read here so forget the national press and read on.Going to curtail this a bit cos its long winded and sometimes boring.

Friday 10th April 09

Bit of a poor effort all things considered for the during the day schedules, ITV more or less has the same stuff they show everyday, i think anyway, five i think is the same, BBC have a mince dancing film with Richard Gere in it called Shall We Dance? which in the course of my life so far i have avoided pretty well and will continue to do so unless something drastic happens. They are also showing Chicken Run which i just dont get, i watched it years ago on a plane to Florida and as i say, didnt get it. I know its probably not that hard to decipher and the fact i was on a plane would have had some sort of bearing on my outcome but even still, didnt get it. But loads of people say its good so i am probably wrong, today i will find out.

C4 has been showing comedy films at 10 the past few fridays and after a few duffers (Date Movie and The Ringer) they come into their own with the Wedding Crashers which i am going to come out and say that in my opinion this is as good as if not better than Anchorman. Vince Vaughn is a genuine hero of mine ever since Swingers and this when i saw it first made me fall in love with him all over again. A bigger recommendation (or maybe more contrversial) i could not give.

Channel Dave is showing the first of its three new episodes of Red Dwarf tonight at 9pm. Called Back to Earth all i know is that they visit The Rovers Return from Coronation Street and thats more than enough info, i will enjoy it all without any spoilers please. Anyway, this return is a major cause for delight at Spice and you know I may even put together a review when all thre are shown but for now i will simply rekindle any memories you may be searching for by simply writing

SMEG!

Splice Movies T.W.A.T.

Midweek Movies T.W.A.T. 6th - 9th April 09

T.W.A.T. means to watch avec telly. This is the Spice Guide to whats on telly thats filmy. Read it and post some comments, what you watched, what you didnt, tell me to stop posting thins crap, your choice.

Avec means "with" i know that but rather than "on" and make it T.W.O.T. its T.W.A.T. cos its aesthetically more pleasing.Another weekend has rolled itself around so here is where to find out what is coming up on the telly if your staying in. Or rather you could probably check the papers too, they have the tv listings, yeah! But it doesnt have the same spin on it you will read here so forget the national press and read on.Going to curtail this a bit cos its long winded and sometimes boring.

Monday 6th Apr 09

Instead of Manhunter which is on ITV tonight i am going to pick out The Fast and the Furious which is getting shown most probably ad nauseum due to the fact the new film is out in the cinemas soon. the new film is called "Fast and Furious" which is a crap title and is taglined by the amazing "new model, original parts" or something which alludes to the fact that the new film has the same folk in it as the 1st one as opposed to the two sequels which diluted the stars more and more as they went along. So this is the original that is on ITV2 at 9pm and its my reccomendtation to watch tonight. its not brilliant, its got Paul Walker as an undercover cop for christ sake and Vin Diesel is in it too and he can be known to suck but even still its pretty exciting and there is some cool tattoos on show. A decent Monday night movie.

Tuesday 7th Apr 09

Swordfish has Halle Berrys tits in it. Its on fiveUSA at 9pm. But you may be watching the football when it starts so you may miss it. its champions league 1st legs though so flick back and forward. Actually there is some stunning action scenes in this so its well worth a look, especially the opening one. Plus Halle Berrys boobs out scene was usurped by her getting pumped by Billy Bob in Monsters Ball so its all a bit meh now. Oh oh oh i should mention John travoltas haircut in Swordfish is worth a look!

Wednesday 8th Apr 09

Nothing to report for watching today so i suppose i should apologise for missing the TWAT last week, was in Amsterdam last weekend so was otherwise engaged then missed the midweek one because i was rough. i have no such excuses for the weekend there, except i was lazy. Sorry if anyone actually reads this.

Thursday 9th Apr 09

lets go with Green Street tonight on ITV4 at 10 pm, the film that inspired thousands of wee dicks the length of the country to be fake cockneys when talking about being hooligans regardless of where they actually come from. Scottish wee dick hoolies actually say cant instead of cunt. In the film if you no know nothing of it, Elijah Woods plays an american student who is pulled in by hooliganism to obvious effect.

Splice Movies T.W.A.T.

Midweek Movies T.W.A.T. 23rd - 26th March 09

T.W.A.T. means to watch avec telly. This is the Spice Guide to whats on telly thats filmy. Read it and post some comments, what you watched, what you didnt, tell me to stop posting thins crap, your choice.





Avec means "with" i know that but rather than "on" and make it T.W.O.T. its T.W.A.T. cos its aesthetically more pleasing.Another weekend has rolled itself around so here is where to find out what is coming up on the telly if your staying in. Or rather you could probably check the papers too, they have the tv listings, yeah! But it doesnt have the same spin on it you will read here so forget the national press and read on.

Going to curtail this a bit cos its long winded and sometimes boring.



Monday 23rd march 09

Im a day late so yesterday you missed Down and Out in Beverly Hills which was a high concept idea at the time no doubt, 1986 if im right, by making Nick Nolte a tramp in Beverly Hills changing the lives of a family of its inhabitants forever, then this happened (right) in 2007 and i suppose it became life immitating art. right thats enough two year late satire from me, all i can say is that if you missed it you missed a good one, glossy 80s comedies are the best!

Tuesday 24th March 09

you may have missed it again cos im posting so late but pick of today has to be Gunmen on fiveUSA at 9pm. Narcotics agent mario van peebles teams up with smuggler christopher lambert (there can be only one) to chase drugs baron patrick stewart (!) also starring denis leary, i mean come on, thats sound amazing! Oh and more4 has Grizzly Man on, the Werner Herzog film about a fucking halfwits who live with grizzlies then get killed to their surprise, supposed to be good.

Wednesday 25th march 09

My tip tonight is to avoid at all costs Down to You on e4 at 9pm, its pure and utter tripe. it stars Freddy prinze jr which would probably put you off anyway but trust me even if you can put up with him its still terrible. I know this because i have seen it, i have seen it because it followed She's all That to these shores and i liked that (quite a lot actually) so i made an effort to see it (out the video shop i must add, not the cinema, im not mental) wish i hadnt, i reitterate my point avoid like the plague.

Thursday 26th march 09

Fight factory films is a uk distribution company whose movies fascinate me when i go shopping in asda, they come in atractive orange skirted covers and there is literaly loads of them, one of which gets (probably) its premiere on fiveUSA tonight at 9pm. The Contractor stars Wesley Snipes as an assasin, and involes key elements such as one last mission, getting framed and on the run which help it blend in with all the other these type of films. (poor poor english) anyway suppose its worth a look. I have just signed myself up to the kick ass flicks newsletter so i can keep abreast of all fight factory releases and news, i urge you all to follow suit.

Charlie Brookers newswipe also starts this week so keep your eyes peeled on bbc4 for it because it will definitely be funny in a proper sarcastic way we can all get on board with.

Splice Movies T.W.A.T.

Weekend Movies T.W.A.T. 20th - 22nd March 09

T.W.A.T. means to watch avec telly. This is the Spice Guide to whats on telly thats filmy. Read it and post some comments, what you watched, what you didnt, tell me to stop posting thins crap, your choice.Avec means "with" i know that but rather than "on" and make it T.W.O.T. its T.W.A.T. cos its aesthetically more pleasing.

Another weekend has rolled itself around so here is where to find out what is coming up on the telly if your staying in. Or rather you could probably check the papers too, they have the tv listings, yeah! But it doesnt have the same spin on it you will read here so forget the national press and read on.

Fri 20th Mar 09

Michael Sheen is on Johnathan Ross to talk about his role as Brian Clough in The Damned Utd, i have went on a bit about this film since i read the book, god it better be good, please let it be good. On ITV at 1.20 i point you in the direction of 3000 Miles to Graceland which is good, Kurt Russell, Kevin Costner, Courtney Cox and Christian Slater make it a strong cast for a film you may not have ever have heard of but this is pretty good. Oh but there is sign language on it, why are deaf people up so late? incidentally, Courtney Cox gets pumped in it so watch and see how this is played out by the fella (or woman) in the corner!

Earlier Crocodile Dundee is on film4, this is one of those intersting films that was so popular it was shown in the afternoon adn some of the racier scenes cut out, such as when Mick finds out the shiela chatting him up is a bloke by grabbing him by the scrotum. I wonder if this is cut out tonight as its showing at 7.10. Blade II is on later at 11pm and although its good and its a Del Toro, i think it misses Deacon Frost, cool name, better baddy.

Sat 21st Mar 09

Ton of stuff on, 12.20 BBC1: Things to do in Denver when your Dead which has Doc Emmett Brown in it, great scot! im in a gangster film! actually this is pretty good. 12.15 on BBC2: Young Frankenstein which i havent seen but should have, ITV at 9pm Notting Hill which i have seen but shouldnt (actually, i think its pretty good actually) and C4 at 1.55 De Niro, Brando and Norton in The Score in the which if im not misteaken is directed by the guy that was Kermit the Frog, and get this, the start time being noted there is no sign language. si that now worth a boo?

70s classic The Deer Hunter is on ITV4 at 10pm, not exactly Saturday night viewing but hey fi you havent ever seen it now is as good a time as any. E4 has The 50 Funniest Comedy films on at 9pm, its been on a hundred times and we have all seen it at least half the times its on but its still worth a wee peek on the breaks of other shows, the top few are obvious but further down you always get some good clips, like you tube without the searching and shit uploads. Police Acedemy is coming back i read, Guttenberg (fresh from his stint in panto (really)) is in line to direct (really) and might appear as mahoney again, but tonight the original is on ITV2 at 10. Its probably the best though i have a soft spot for number 4; Citizens on Patrol! Ok thats enough confesionals.

Sunday 22nd Mar 09

If you have a whole day to dedicate to a film then Ben Hur is on five, for four hours, four, hours! You know i am not exactly sure what its about but im sure with four hours to play with its about a whole load of things. Anyway, five is the home of Sundays films as a Jack black double bill is on, can i just say that i saw Jack Black in the flesh in Amsterdam a few years ago and now i am going back to Amsterdam, conincidence? i would say yes. Shallow Hal and then Envy from 9pm.

Only thing worth noting on digital is Armed and Dangerous on ITV2 at midnight, John Candy, his films were always pretty good in the 80s. I am off work on Monday so this one is gettingstayed up for!

Splice Movies T.W.A.T.

Midweek Movies T.W.A.T. 16th - 19th March 09

T.W.A.T. means to watch avec telly. This is the Spice Guide to whats on telly thats filmy. Read it and post some comments, what you watched, what you didnt, tell me to stop posting thins crap, your choice.

Avec means "with" i know that but rather than "on" and make it T.W.O.T. its T.W.A.T. cos its aesthetically more pleasing.Another weekend has rolled itself around so here is where to find out what is coming up on the telly if your staying in. Or rather you could probably check the papers too, they have the tv listings, yeah! But it doesnt have the same spin on it you will read here so forget the national press and read on.

Monday 16th Mar 09

Four evening movies for your perusal, BBC1 has Trapped: Buried Alive which i can only assume is utter mince. Its on at 12.15. More assumed pish on five at 11pm, Buying the Cow is a comedy with Jerry O'Connell, I'll leave it there. It gets better on ITV with Cadillac Man at 11.35, a Robin Williams film made before he went so sugary sacharine and nye on unwatchable! No bad! all this brings me to, Well, if your off on tuesday then give Gangs of New York a whirl at 10pm on C4, its on for 190 minutes! 190, christ Scorsese is coming it a wee bit witht hat, you can probably stick it off when the neverending credits start cos there isnt a Iron Man style appearnce of Sam Jackson with an eye patch just a U2 song if im not mistaken, 1.10 quickly becomes 1am on the nosewhich is almost palletable.

I mentioned it on the weekend TWAT in regards to The Departed and low and behold it appears! Film4 has Infernal Affairs on at 10.50! this is a wonderful film, wonderful! Also on digital and also from the far east is Ping Pong, a film about tabel tennis. I am now deciding what is a better name, Ping Pong or table Tennis? there only one way to decide this... 10.30 on BBC4.

Tuesday 17th Mar 09

Tuesday it would appear is dead to films and film type shows. Nothing of note is on the schedules. Film 2009 i suppose but the most over exposed pair in tv today Horne and Corden discuss their new film together so maybe its worth avoiding. Channel 6 or higher tonight folks.

But its not much better up there, Intolerable cruelty on ITV2 is worth a look, Coens doing screwball comedy, so look for it at 10pm. fiveUSA at 9pm has a newish JCVD film, you know the ones you have never heard of before, Second on Command anyone? nah, never thought so. Film4 however has a night of entertainment! 9pm Airplane!, frequently voted in the best comedy films ever, then at 10.45 Jackie Brown, and then at 1.40 Infernal Affairs II, alright tis on a bit late this night of entertainment but still, a night of entertainment nonethe less. I should also add that Infernal Affairs II is maybe the best sequel ever.

Wednesday 18th Mar 09

After yesterday anything will do and that anything is a George Clooney thriller from 1997, Teh Peacemaker. Its a bti mince but it was Clooney trying to break out the Doug Ross thing from ER and hey, look how he turned out! We'll let him away with it i think. Its not often i mention afternoon movie treats as they are mostly dramas about babies going to the wrong parents in the hospital or some crummy western but today we have an Ealing Comedy so i will mark your card with that. Kind Hearts and Coronets. 1.20 on C4.

Digital is shit tonight.

Thursday 19th Mar 09

Red Riding finished tonight, di you know that this series of films was based on books by David Peace, the writer of the forthcoming Damned United? Bit of a flavour of the month this guy. Anyway, good drama shocker on TV so watch it. Because the alternative is Species 2 on five at 10pm. There is probably shagging in that though.

There can be only one! Yes Highlander is on ITV4 tonight, yas! I know its been highlighted many times before, i am aware i am not the first to ever say it but really, Highlander is a film about a Scotsman who can live forever, played by a frenchman Christopher Lambert with a slight slight French accent, very slight, he is helped in his quest by a Spaniard played by a Scotsman in the shape of Sean Connery in the broadest Scottish accent he could muster! Genius! Who Wants to Live forever! Thursday? i cant wait. If thats not your bag then im not talking to you. Other stuff is on i suppose but sorry, highlander is compulsory viewing.

Movies T.W.A.T.

Weekend Movies T.W.A.T. 13th - 15th March 09

T.W.A.T. means to watch avec telly. This is the Spice Guide to whats on telly thats filmy. Read it and post some comments, what you watched, what you didnt, tell me to stop posting thins crap, your choice.Avec means "with" i know that but rather than "on" and make it T.W.O.T. its T.W.A.T. cos its aesthetically more pleasing.

Another weekend has rolled itself around so here is where to find out what is coming up on the telly if your staying in. Or rather you could probably check the papers too, they have the tv listings, yeah! But it doesnt have the same spin on it you will read here so forget the national press and read on.

Fri 13th Mar 09

Tis Comic Relief tonight so the only competition on terrestial is barbershop on STV with Ice Cube about a Barbershop strangely and get Rich or Die Trying about 50 Cent starring 50 Cent. Oh Dear. Watch Comic Relief.

After a frankly indefferent Cheltenham festival for you writer here Seabiscuit isn't really what i am wanting to see however if it sound good to you 8.05 on BBC3. Sleuth is on ITV3, this sound familiar, it might as its was remade Last year starring Jude law and Michael Caine, this is the original of the remake with Caine in the Law role and Olivier in the Caine role, that make sense? No? oh well then. BBC4 have some right good music doco's in its schedule every once in a while and tonight might be another, Do it Yourself: The Story of Rough Trade Records is on at 9pm, bound to be some good stroies in it at the very least.

Sat 14th Mar 09

Ok, what the bloody fuck, Young Guns II is on five at twenty minutes to six! now if memory serves there is a hooker who rides a horse naked in that one, something tells me that will be edited out, and if it is wahts the point of watching! later on at night there is some good stuff, 9pm sees a battle between C4 and ITV, I, Robot v About a Boy. personally About a Boy wins for me but both have plenty in the tank to entice viewers. lets think about About a Boy, the irritating wee tit who plays the boy Hugh grants character takes under his wing went on and shagged everything in Skins, also in Skins was Dev Patel who only turned up at an audition for something to do, then he went on and starred in Slumdog which ripped the pants off the awards ceremonies this year. Skins therefore is a turning point in something for some folk. There, a well thought out arguement. C4 has another few films on, Ali at 11.10 which gets better and better every time you watch it and sex Lives of the potato men which i am going to try catch cos it cant be as bad as is made out. Also, check out ITV at 11.05 as After Hours is on, a lesser known Scorsese film form 85, interesting as a few Scorsese flicks are on in the next few days but i will get to them when they appear.

Digital channel BBC4 is doing a japanese type season, i know this becasue i have seen some ads over the past few days, Sat night has Kikujiro on at 11.30. personally i know nothing about it but it has takeshi Kitano in it and i have heard of him so we'll go with that. FiveUSA are ripping the piss with Starship Troopers 2 at 10pm and fiver have, wait for it, Dirty Dancing. Any guys reading who are having a night in with the girl, it is possible to delete channels from your digibox so my suggestion is do it, just research the next day adn get it back, dont lose your Saturday night to putting babies in the corner and old men lifting young lassies by the crotch both in the water and in a climatic scene on a dancefloor. Seriously, delete it.

Sun 15th mar 09

Well shiver me timbers, sunday is as impressive a council telly day as Sat! 4.10 on ITV, why its The Neverending Story! join Bastian and Atreyu and all the other weird stuff, that big flying dog thing et al as they try adn save the princess or some balls. Its fucking excellent! 5.35 on five is Superman, the Christopher Reeve one, now i am going to make a wee confession, one of the Superman films scared the shit out of me as a youngster, the one where richard Prior gets turned into a robot or some sort of plastic thing, shat it every time. this one im pretty sure isnt it so i can rest easy. After that, its Talladega Nights! A premiere at 8.15. What a laugh. Ricky Bobby's weans steal it for me when they talk back to their granpa. Genius.

Right, i have taken a new paragraph but its nto because i have moved to digital picks, no, its because the other premiere of the night is on C4 and its called The Departed. Scorsese's Oscar winner (at long last) and its absolutely brilliant. A remake of the Hong Kong masterpiece Infernal Affairs its just as good as its original. You know what, just watch it, if you have seen it who cares watch it again, and look out Infernal, its good too.

Digital isnt too hot tonight, Basic Instinct on ITV2 at 11pm could be interesting in these times where pausing live tv is a posibility, get a wee swatch at shazzas snatch and stick it back over to soemthing else, actually, thats not fair, stones fanny aside its not that bad a thriller as it goes. weekend over.

Splice Movies T.W.A.T.

Midweek Movies T.W.A.T. 9th - 12th March 09

T.W.A.T. means to watch avec telly. This is the Spice Guide to whats on telly thats filmy. Read it and post some comments, what you watched, what you didnt, tell me to stop posting thins crap, your choice.Avec means "with" i know that but rather than "on" and make it T.W.O.T. its T.W.A.T. cos its aesthetically more pleasing.

Another weekend has rolled itself around so here is where to find out what is coming up on the telly if your staying in. Or rather you could probably check the papers too, they have the tv listings, yeah! But it doesnt have the same spin on it you will read here so forget the national press and read on.

Monday 9th Mar 09

Back when it was released some 6 or 7 years ago, Daredevil was shat on big time. But flying in the face of it i actually rather liked it. It spawned a sequel of sorts, as this films centres on the love interest from Daredevil who dies in the original, so its a spin off type thing. Its on C4 at ten and is the perfect thing for a post weekend wind down, though its not that good its not terrible and thats ok. Also worth a look and from that sequel territory is Police Story 2, anyone who read last weeks TWAT will know my feelings on the dumbing down of foreign films in the schedules so i will just say its on and move on. Jackie Chan at 11.05 on five. Another British comedy is on tonight, this time on ITV at 11.35. Ready When you Are, Mr McGill is its name and i really dont know where they all come from, you never hear about them untill they are on the tv! This one has the makings of a good cast, Nighy, Courtenay and Holden, yes Amanda Holden, I am maybe seeing now why this film has never came up on my radar. I'm a Cyborg, But thats OK is on at 11.50 on C4 tonight also, its billed as a comedy but i am not so sure it will blow your socks off, its a Korean film by the director of Oldboy (and the other 2 from his vengeance trilogy) I shall be recording it as its a bit late for me but is certainly looks interesting.

Also returning tonight is The Gadget Show on five. Its like top Gear for technology and is surprisingly addictive, anyway tonights show looks at 3D tellys and with the glut of 3D movies which are to be released in the near future its wortha wee look i think. 8pm.

Good baseball movie on film4 tonight at 7. Bad News Bears, which was remade a few years ago with Billy Bob in the adult role, has Walter Mathau in this the original. He takes on a kids team of ne'er do wells in the hope to find success, comedy ensues. Trust me, if it made it to these shores then it cant be half bad, i have noted a paragraph up about the crap British films that seem to appear on the tv, well there will be ten a penny baseball films over in the states we see nothing of, and that god! stay with film4 all night if you wish as Planet of the Apes follows, Tim Burtons version which isnt as bad as made out i think, then Kung Fu Hustle which is a riot. At time of posting this i dont know whether its dubbed or subtitles, wither way its a pish laugh though! The only other thing of note i can spot is Drop Zone on itv4 at 10pm, a Wesley Snipes actioner (is this a word?) which also stars the original and best Busey, Gary not Jake.

Tuesday 10th Mar 09

Charles Bronson seems to be the order of the day on normal TV as with a lack of films showing his biopic seems to be covered on the tv shows that are on. This Morning has the star of the film Tom Hardy telling Phil and Fern what it was like to play one of Britains most notorious prisoners and then Film 2009 is reviewing it. 10.30am and 11.05pm respectively. And thats it, normal tv dissapoints.

its down to digital to save Tuesday and gladly it does, its not laden with stuff no but it covers all bases, its Champions league day for ITV so ITV4 follows its game with Rambo: 1st Blood. Its down as 10pm but extra time and penalties may play havoc with that so keep em peeled, testosterone highs alround. I admittedly think Rambo is pants but i have been assured that i am wrong on this count and that time has blunted my opinion, its been some ten years or more since i seen it, so I will give it another go, the two sequels are on the following two nights also. To compensate for bloke vision on STV and ITV4, ITV2 has tried to redress the balance, by screeneing womens shows during the football hours, two hour long pieces of tat with paris Hilton then Coleen Rooney are followed by Bridget Jones 2, which actually doesnt call its self Bridget jones 2 rather Bridget Jones: Edge of Reason. I also want to pick out Hamburger Hill on fiveUSA (9pm) as it is probably my favourite Vietnam movie and also Short Cuts on film4 at 11pm as its a work of genius.

Wednesday 11th Mar 09

Another day of not much to go on but at least some features appear in the schedules, BBC1 has a thriller at 10.45 called Bad Company starring Anthony Hopkins, so far so good but it co-stars Chris Rock and centres around a murdered secret agents streetwise twin brother who is recruited to take his place and its at this point where worry creeps in. But all this sounds better than Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo which is fives movie at 10pm.

FiveUSA do an interesting thing on a Wednesday night, they show their prime time 9pm film shown on the nest night at a later 11pmish slot. For example, this week its the Longest Yard, a Adam Sandler remake of a Burt Reynolds American football film, its on at 11pm on Wed but also 9pm on the Thurs. What is good about it is for some people 9pm is a bit troublesome to watch things, theya re night hawks and prefer to kick off a little later so this does them a wee favour, a not bad flick on that wee bit later. Cheers to fiveUSA.

Thursday 12th Mar 09

Ok, i boobed something rotten last week when i failed to spot that C4 trilogy of good dark dramas was starting, the ads have been on for weeks and its my own fault for failing to spot it, i am making amend now though so there. Red Riding continues tonight at 9pm. It follows on from last weeks episode/tv movie which can be watched still for another few weeks on channel 4's website in the catch up bit, thats where i am headed after i finish this as i not only failed to flag it, i also failed to catch it when it was on!

On digital were going to go with Batman at 9pm on film4, Tim Burtons 1989 effort seems strange now in light of Christopher Nolan's entries into the fray. What with the lurid colours and the dancing, yes dancing its nothing like the murky darkness of Batmans latest incarnation, Its worth another look though to campare and contrast i feel. Plus, there isn't much else on the ol digital!

Splice Movies T.W.A.T.

Weekend Movies T.W.A.T. 6th - 8th March 09

T.W.A.T. means to watch avec telly. This is the Spice Guide to whats on telly thats filmy. Read it and post some comments, what you watched, what you didnt, tell me to stop posting thins crap, your choice.

Avec means "with" i know that but rather than "on" and make it T.W.O.T. its T.W.A.T. cos its aesthetically more pleasing.Another weekend has rolled itself around so here is where to find out what is coming up on the telly if your staying in. Or rather you could probably check the papers too, they have the tv listings, yeah! But it doesnt have the same spin on it you will read here so forget the national press and read on.

Friday 6th Mar 09

Get this one in your diaries, QI, the quiz show with Stephen Fry is on tonight in its regular 9pm slot and this week since its series F the subject is film! Hooray! Prepare to be astounded. Also worth look is Friday Night with Johnathan Ross as his guest is Michael C Hall who is magnificent in both Dexter and Six Feet Under. Right enough straight telly talk, whats the films on offer i hear you cry. The answer; Dirty Dancing: Havana Nights. Well you asked for it. For what its worth this film is pure tripe, but i am sure you either already know that or can make an educated guess. Its 11.40 if you need to see it. Five minutes earlier over on cash strapped ITV Empire is on, the guy that played Luigi in the Super Mario Bros film is in it, it might be alright actually.

9pm on Sky3 sees movie time in the shape of Infected. This has the year in brackets beside it and the year is 2008 meaning only one thing; this is some piece of straight to video guff! Saving grace? Judd Nelson is in it. John Bender as i live and breath. 10pm however could leave you in a quandry as some bonefide stoaters duke it out plus a Jim Bond one on ITV4. The titans about to clash are more4 with Patriot Games, a decent action thriller, e4 with the simply stunning Zoolander and ITV3 with a all time lazy Sunday favourite of mine Overboard. Ultimately its your decision but if i was to sway you it would be toward Kurt Russell essentially kidnapping Goldie Hawn to teach her a lesson in Overboard. Marvel at how this almost seemed like the right thing to do but would be Daily Mailed to death if it was remade!

Saturday 7th Mar 09

England get the FA cup on this fine Saturday afternoon, while in Scotland we get The Rare Breed, a 1966 film starring James Stewart about cows and bulls and that. Nice. So thats 12noon for us Scots, stick it in your diaries. Five has a cult classic at 3.20, Who’s Harry Crumb? An often overlooked piece of John Candy’s canon much like the similarly great What About Bob? form Bill Murray’s. WAB isn’t on though incase your confused, WHC is. In the evening the late BBC1 movie is Ladder 49 which is about firemen and is probably polished enough and not use up any real energy to watch so in essence a perfect late night flick. Channel4 has A Man Apart which is much the same as Ladder 49 in spirit but with Vin Diesel. BBC2 are showing something a bit left field though (as they tend to do on a Saturday gladly) A Prairie Home Companion I dont remember making a huge splash in the UK but the cast looks solid and its a comedy about a radio station so i think i will give it a try. 11.15.

ITV3 are getting another look in for showing 80’s forgotten nuggets, this time its the Michael J Fox one The Secret of my Success, to remind you, its the one where he pumps his aunt without knowing its his aunt and orchestrates the couple throught he wall shagging. 2.45 in the afternoon. At night its a battle between big fat steaming piles of garbage BBC3 has The Lake House, ITV3; The Guru (shame on you ITV3 after me praising you to the hilt) five USA; Fortress. Allon at times between 9 and 10 pm. Guff the lot of them. Virgin1 however have a classic to save the night. Rain Man. 9pm.

Sunday 8th Mar 09

I like to describe myself as ambidextrous when it comes to my film comedy, I love a sly piece of satire as much as the next man, but i also dont turn my nose up at stuff which should only be funny to 12 year old boys and with that in mind i implore you to watch The Benchwarmers at half 6 on five. Its a hoot, the only downside i felt was John Heder who i think actually really irritates me, maybe because i never really got napoleon Dynamite? I dont know, but this Benchwarmers thing is worth a watch. On C4 later is another sports based movie (Benchwarmers is baseball) this time is football or since its an American film, Soccer. She’s the Man sees a soccer mad chick dress up as a guy to play fitba only to fall in love with a teammate who thinks she is a guy and have a burd fall in love with her thinking she is a guy. Oh aye, the guy that he/she fancies actually fancies the burd who fancies the he/she. Clear as mud. A love triangle with fitba. Its a chick flick (horrible horrible phrase) but Amanda Bynes is a wee cracker so we’ll maybe have a wee peek. After that C4 have another film, Elizabethtown, the Cameron Crowe film thats not quite as famous as his others. BBC1’s late movie is Deathtrap, an old film starring Michael Caine and Christopher Reeve, Michael Caine films are a troubling breed, i actually have no idea where this one fits into the pantheon but i thought i would flag it regardless.

If you get up rather early due to a hangover and switch on ITV3 at 10am you can watch To Kill a Mockingbird, thats alright isn’t it, not often you get that as a treat. Moving on through the afternoon, 1pm on film4 can show you why i dont get Napoleon Dynamite as its on! this is actually a good idea to watch if you plan on seeing Benchwarmers because if i recall its because he seems to just play John Heder playing Napoleon Dynamite playing whatever character is in the particular film and that irritates me. Anyway, two hours free after it finishes so make your dinner cos at 5pm on fiveUSA has The Medallion which is a Jackie Chan American vehicle and 7pm on BBC3 has Meet the Parents which is funny. This Sunday is shaping up nicely and now you have an hour to get a shower and prepare yourself for the night shift, which comprises of Lock Up on ITV4 (10pm) (Sly Stallone in the prison one which isnt Tango and Cash) and then if you turn over to Dave while the credits come up you wont miss any of Dark Angel starring Dolph Lundgren which starts at 10 past 12. Now with all that taken in over the course of a Sunday you will have plenty and i mean plenty to talk about at your work come Monday. No need to thank me.

Splice Movies T.W.A.T.

Here is what i left off mondays movie T.W.A.T. post that i promised for today.

Wed 4th Mar 09

Have you ever watched Jack and Sawyer and Kate and Locke et al in the tv phenomenon Lost? Have you ever watched an episode and saw someone in a flashback for instance who was so familiar let not so you typed in Lost into the old Imdb website to check out who it is (Locke’s dad is the guy from Roadhouse by the way) well when you type it in then the TV series shows up and also a film from the year 2004 starring Dean Cain well this film is on tonight at 5 past 12 on bbc1, no idea what its about or anything just recognised it from imdb and thought i would share. Other stuff on worth noting is channel4 at 1.15, C4 like to stick a wee indie movie in during the night which is great, sometimes you get a wee gem, however a lot of them now have sign language which is irritating. tonight’s one is The Safety of Objects which is about unhappy suburban americans, sounds about right!

Once Upon a Time in the Midlands is on film4 too, 11.05. Shane Meadows, what a guy!

Thurs 5th Mar 09

What a swizz Thursday is i have to say, Will Smith season continues on fiveUSA with Men II Black at 9, weird way of writing it and all. On normal telly, there is only one thing on, 10pm on five, BLOODSPORT! Bloodsport, no more needs to be said.

Splice Movies T.W.A.T.

Midweek Movies T.W.A.T. 2nd Mar - 5th Mar 09

T.W.A.T. means to watch avec telly. This is the Spice Guide to whats on telly thats filmy. Read it and post some comments, what you watched, what you didnt, tell me to stop posting thins crap, your choice.

Avec means "with" i know that but rather than "on" and make it T.W.O.T. its T.W.A.T. cos its aesthetically more pleasing.Another weekend has rolled itself around so here is where to find out what is coming up on the telly if your staying in. Or rather you could probably check the papers too, they have the tv listings, yeah! But it doesnt have the same spin on it you will read here so forget the national press and read on.

Monday 2nd Mars 09

A Time to Kill is on bbc1 at 11.15 tonight and guess what, its a decent John Grisham adaptation! Trust me when i say that there is a good few Grisham adapts and by and large they suck, the Chamber being a massive disappointment, but this, this one is good. C4 have phone booth on a little earlier at 11 however and this is perfect for if you have work then next day, why? Only because its one of the shortest films in the last few years! Its on commercial telly and stil comes in under 2hrs, thats just grand. Also on council telly is Police Story (11pm , five) is it just me or is it wrong that our inteligence is insulted in some papers and guides when they billit as Jackie Chans Police Story as if we wouldnt know it already, i mean we all knew exactly what it was aiming at when we read it didn't we? wrong wrong wrong!

Prime time viewing on the digi telly has ITV2 showing Chronicles of Riddick at 9pm, this is the follow up sort of of Pitch Black, which was really rather good though i havent heard too many good things about this, what has really happened to Vin Diesel, remember he presented the European Music Awards in Edinburgh years ago? what will happen to Katy Perry then in years to come? heres hoping its porn.

Film4 have a wee bit of a rotoscoping evening happening with Richard Linklaters two efforts using it back to back, A Scanner Darkly then its predecessor, in style not content, Waking Life. Rotoscoping to the uninitiated is when the live action is painted over frame by frame to make it look animated, it looks cool when done right and this is it done right. bbc4 continue its Hitchcock week, a week i never actually realised was a week until today with Stage Fright then a another wee doco. Nice.

Oh i must mention that sky3 is showing Aztec Rex again so if you missed it on Friday then dont miss it tonight, read the weekend TWAT to see what i am talking about. USually wouldnt mention a repeat on digi channel but when it comes to Aztec Rex exceptions can be made!

Tuesday 3rd Mar 09

normal telly is showing jack shit except Film 2009, which is notable because they are reviewing Watchmen and it spilce friends looks ace! also after film 2009 some British piece of fluff is on, The One and Only, I dont think i have ever heard of it but get the feeling my ever so slight insomnia might lead to me catching a bit of it so i thought i would flag it up anyway.

Digital telly is where its at this fine Tuesday as its Hollywood gold all the way! Panic Room (9pm) on fiveUSA for instance? ITV4 showing Escape from LA then Boyz in the Hood back2back form 10 past 10? film4 showing Independance Day (9pm)? The choice is yours, eacha nd every one is a bone fide winner!

PSome points on a few of them however, what exactly is in a long neck that the guys in Boyz in the Hood and such films drink? and also, who remembers wehn Independance Day was like the biggest thing ever to happen in any given summer? oh and the video box had a hologram thing of the White House which when you moved it left or right it showed the White House on the cusp of blowing up or actually blowing up. Small joys, frankly you can stick your bluray up your arse, holograms such as that are much better than seeing folks plooks cos of the extremly good quality of HD!

Wed 4th Mar 09 and 4th Mar 09 will appear on these pages on Wed about sixish.

Splice Movies T.W.A.T.

Weekend Movies T.W.A.T. 27th Feb - 1st March 09

T.W.A.T. means to watch avec telly. This is the Spice Guide to whats on telly thats filmy. Read it and post some comments, what you watched, what you didnt, tell me to stop posting thins crap, your choice.Avec means "with" i know that but rather than "on" and make it T.W.O.T. its T.W.A.T. cos its aesthetically more pleasing.

Another weekend has rolled itself around so here is where to find out what is coming up on the telly if your staying in. Or rather you could probably check the papers too, they have the tv listings, yeah! But it doesnt have the same spin on it you will read here so forget the national press and read on.

Friday 27th Jan 2009

‘normal’ telly has been at it all week and as we come to Friday its no different, absolutely balls all on. The only thing worth a look and only if you cant find the remote to turn it over or you can find the remote but its slightly out of reach and because its friday you deont actually make any effort to get it....oh and the telly is set to BBC1 then you can watch Halloween H20! You know what, that is a right shit name for a film.

Digital is where its at however, Sky3 to be precise and 9pm the time. Aztec Rex is on. What? Never heard of it? me neither i will admit, however get this, its about 16th century Spanish explorers battling dinosaurs in a South American jungle. now you have to put that gem of a synopsis together with the knowledge (or lack of) that none of us have heard of it and realise that this is going to be a steaming pile of dung, and that friends is a reason to rejoice!

Also on and battling out for your 10pm viewing are three films on ITV4, ITV3 and more4 respectively, Cyborg starring JCVD (he is everywhere right now), The Graduate and Millers Crossing being the films shown. Millers Crossing is the Coens stab at American gangster cinema and frankly its cracking, also if your a Spice fan you will know that the slightly neglected guide to the top 100 films of the 90s has it on the slate as the next film to show up on the ever growing list, so this is a great chance to see what we will be talking about as soon as Red gets his finger out!

Sex Pistols doco The Filth and the Fury is on film4 at 11.15 by the way if you can find and hold the remote in your grasp and cant face Halloween H2O, up to you.

Saturday 28th jan 2009

Saturday has basically decided to follow suit with the working days of the week and decided to be pant also. ITV and C4 have films on at nine each and both are worth a look, you may have seen them, Bourne Supremacy and Shawshank Redemption? Midnight on BBC1 has Terry Gillian mind fucking us to a pulp with 13 Monkeys also, so even though its only three choices there all goodies, dont get me wrong there is more stuff on, but on the whole nothing stuck out so if nothing takes your fancy have a can of beer and make a conscious effort to fall asleep during match of the day.

It’s the pure biz on bbc4 on Saturday, a Hitchcock night of sorts, two films; The Lady Vanishes which is hilarious in parts and Rebecca which is absolutely wonderful. But also on is a hour long doco by Paul Merton called Paul Merton looks at Alfred Hitchcock. Its on at 9pm and surrounded by the two films but get this if you miss it then you can see it the other two times its on this very night! Back of 12 and back of 3. It must be mega!

Nearly forgot, fiveUSA’s western double bill. The Shootist and Silverado. The Shootist is John Waynes last ever film so suppose that piece of history is worth a watch, after having missed McLintock last Sat i may just make The Shootist my entry point to ol Marion’s canon.

Sunday 1st Mar 2009

Does Sunday signify a new week or simply the last day of the old one? Something to ponder i suppose, as far as this preview thing goes its the start of the week as there is some good shit on and plenty of it. BBC2 has Connery and Caine, yes Connerya nd Caine in the Man who would be King at 3pm a good afternoon flick and up against a piece of Bond pish on ITV no less! HA! Easy, no Michael Caine in Bond! If thats not yer bag then Wizard of Oz is on five at 10 to 4. Can i just say that i like those new Orange ad’s with the wicked witch of the west in them, there funny. Evening viewing has Jackie Chan and Chris Tucker in Rush Hour 2, now i dont care what anyone says, i bloody like Rush Hour films, i think they are funny, and Chris Tucker isnt irritating, he is funny as shit! oh alright he is a bit irritating, but it doesnt waste my enjoyment of the east meets west hijinks.

Film4 offer up back to back doozies at 11.20 and then 1.05 so if you can stay up there is Office Space from the guy who did Beavis and Butthead and also Altmans The Player, not a too bad double header. Also worth a watch is Kevin and Perry go Large on ITV2 at 11pm. Its basically about ten thousand willie jokes put together but some memories are brought back for me cos there is a scene where you can see the podium thing i danced horribly on when drunk on a boys hol in Ibiza and that makes me happy.

Cheers.

Splice Movies T.W.A.T.

Midweek Movies T.W.A.T. 23th - 26th February 09

T.W.A.T. means to watch avec telly. This is the Spice Guide to whats on telly thats filmy. Read it and post some comments, what you watched, what you didnt, tell me to stop posting thins crap, your choice.

Avec means "with" i know that but rather than "on" and make it T.W.O.T. its T.W.A.T. cos its aesthetically more pleasing.


Well after 1 week just i managed to fuck the Movie T.W.A.T. up, posting the midweek picks a day late, well sorry.

Right, yesterday you missed, well not a lot really, Clint in Pale Rider on STV and newly crowned Best Director in the Oscars Danny Boyles 28 Days Later, Both of which i havent seen, however i have seen City Slickers and i can say first hand its excellent but it was on ITV2 and thus will be on again, no doubt this week some time!

Tuesday 24th Feb 2009

Nothing of note, film wise, on “normal” telly today so i will pojnt you in the direction of Dangermouse which is on BBC2 at 11 in the morning, let me tell you this, this show was wasted on the young, becuase it is hands down absolutely off its tits hilarious, hilarious.
Bloody Young Guns is on fiveUSA tonight, ya dancer, havent seen this in ages, in fact i have no idea what happens in it its been so long. This isnt the one with the Bon Jovi soundtrack though is it? thats Young Guns II: Blaze of Glory i am sure. I liked Bon Jovi when i was younger, a confession i never thought i would make and certainly not in this context. Strange. Manhunter is also on ITV2 at ten tonight, its supposed to be good but i have always been scared of it so haven't seen it, again another confession, what is wrong with me.

Wednesday 25th Feb 2009

Movie connections reaches the end of its series on BBC1 tonight with a whimper if you ask me, Calendar Girls? Really? But i suppose its not bad background telly. Another Danny Boyle film is on tonight and it follows movie connections on the Beeb, Millions, his film from 2004 about a young fella who finds a bag of money, supposed to be good, again another film i havent seen. Thing is, was this intentional to show these things in the week after the Oscars, and what if he got beat to the statue, they wouldnt have pulled the films but then surely its just for a wee ratings boost. I am overthinking this.

Nothing much on digital on Wed except Ghost of Mars which frankly looks pure baws.
No wait, BBC4 has the Zidane movie! Fitba and cinema mixed with balding Frenchmen. A match made in heaven and only on for 90 minutes! 10pm to 11.30 i now know what i am watching.

Thursday 26th February 2009

What a guff week it has been for “council” telly (i love the names terrestial tv gets) I thought there was a hidden gem on BBC2 on Thurs; James Caan’s jobs about the secret life of the man who made Sonny Corleone such a cinema icon but sadly its just a show about the guy from Dragons Den. Boo.

And digital on Thurs seems to suck donkey dong too, ton of stuff that has been on a fair bit in last week or two so not worth mentioning again, fiveUSA has the Will Smith season on again, Men in Black this week, a goody. You know what i am going to highlight, film4, 6.40, Batman and Robin! Joel Schumacher’s second effort and widely regarded as the one that killed the franchise before Chris Nolan ripped it a new one a few years ago. Its mince, yes that is true, but not as mince as everyone goes on and says it is. Watch it eating your tea, sometimes things are better eating your tea. Hollyoaks for instance, annoying most of the time but with a plate of spag bol in front of you and its strangely palatable. Batman and Robin could be looked upon in this manner.

cheers

Splice Movies T.W.A.T.

Weekend Movies T.W.A.T. 20th - 22nd February 09

T.W.A.T. means to watch avec telly. This is the Spice Guide to whats on telly thats filmy. Read it and post some comments, what you watched, what you didnt, tell me to stop posting thins crap, your choice.

Avec means "with" i know that but rather than "on" and make it T.W.O.T. its T.W.A.T. cos its aesthetically more pleasing.

Friday 20th Feb 09

Afternoon off and absolutely hundereds of time on your hands? Cleopatra is on Channel 4 starting at 10.20 and finishing at half three it even has a break for the news just like a classic ITV monday night movie! See a young Liz Taylor and Richard Burton in a lavish excuse of a movie and go make yourself a piece in between, excellent! I will be working though. Boo.

At night; Micky Rourke is a guest on Jonathan Ross, anyone who saw his appearance on Graham Norton will be both worried and excited about the prospects of this. BBC4 has a doco on Motown called Standing on the Shoulders of Motown which is in amongst its Motown night (too much use of Motown?) and More4 has a decent De Niro film (15minutes) both at 10pm.

Crap films for you on friday: Bringing Down the House on BBC1 (11.40) has the magic pairing of Steve Martin and Queen Latifah so that will be crap but it made the cinemas in the UK. STV has How High (12.05) which stars Wu tang Clan member Method Man starring, rap stars as movie stars usually means pish, rap stars as movie stars in movies you have never even heard of before doesnt bode well. Finally Dave (dave?) has a film on, usually its wall to wall Top Gear and Mock the Week but no, Friday the 20th has Code of Silence at 1am adn it stars Chuck Norris! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAS!

Saturday 21st Feb 09

Another afternoon film on Saturday, 3.25 sees Mclintock shown on BBC2, John Wayne! I am going to make a confession, i have never seen a John Wayne film in my life, not one. Is this the place to start, should i start at all? As evening falls 9pm has many channels vieing for your attentions, virgin1 has De Niro flick Flawless, fiveUSA has Spiderman, ITV has Bourne Identity with old school 10o'clock news in between. Remember the LYNX monday night movie or the monday night movie sponsored by Diet Coke, ah those were the days! BBC3 has the actually quite excellent The Girl Next Door which has the double whammy of a plot about porn starring Elisha Cuthbert totally usurped by a film stealing performance by Timothy Olyphant.

Later on, Scottish film alert on BBC2 True North (10.45) has Peter Mullan in it so must be alright, Peter Jackson pre LOTR in Heavenly Creatures (Midnight, BBC1), Channel4 has Heartbreak Ridge (11pm) with Clint which is good fun and ITV4 has This is Spinal Tap which i genuinly dont get, im sure i will sometime but from memory of seeing it, i simply thought it was one of the most overrated films ever.

Ok, hard to believe i am saying this (especially after my Spinal Tap outburst) but stand out for Saturday is on fiveUSA at 11.20. RoadHouse II: Last Call. A sequel to the best ever film about bouncers, need i say more?

Sunday 22nd Feb 09

Some James Bond flick is on in the afternoon (yawn) but fuck that cos Short Circuit is on five at 6.15! Johnny 5 is alive indeed!

The 9pm battle is between Ray (ITV3) Entrapement (E4) My Super Ex Girlfriend (CH4) and Attack Force (Seagal pish on five) but never mind them cos Top Gun is on at 10 on ITV2 and you dont want to miss any of that! who can tell me off the top of their heads what Mavericks real name is by the way? More Cruise on CH4 at 11.25 in cameron Crowes Vanilla Sky, a true mind fuck. and on film4 at five to one Che Guevarra film The Motorcycle Diaries, heard its good.

Oh aye, its kinda breaking the rules but if you have the chance and the insomnia try watching the Oscars which is on at 1am.

Remember and leave a wee comment if you watch any of these recommendations or have any more to add. or think i waffle a proper load of shit.

Cheers

Splice Movies T.W.A.T.

Midweek 16th - 19th Feb 09

Splice from now on brings you a regular update on movies and the like of sort of thing that you can watch from the comfort of your own settee. Movie T.W.A.T. means movies to (T) watch (W) avec (A) tv (T). Now i know what your thinking, avec means with, well yes it does but TWOT with the o for on but really TWAT is far more childishly funny so avec it is. Movies to watch with tv: Movie T.W.A.T. See?

basically it will cover all films wortha look on terrestial tv and also freeview, plus anything else which might be deemed worthy by us. Also your attention will be brought to whenever a cheese hero of the movies makes a appearance on the box. seagal, JCVD, Swayze, etc.

soon i will boil all that info down into something much more managelble but for now...

Right here goes, Monday the 16th is tonight and tonight we have a rake of good stuff, American Cousins is on BBC1, its a cracking wee scottish movie written by a guy i and red have met, a certain Sergio Casci. We met him at university, (he did a lecture, he wasnt a clasmate) and he was a top bloke. Truth is we were asked to watch the film before we met him so my thoughts on it are based on own opinion and not simply cos the Casci is a cracking guy. Its on after midnight though so it'l be a late one. Also on late is John Woo's the Killer which is dove releasingly amazing, if you cant wait up all night watch the opening scene just until he recovers his hidden guns in the plant pots. Stunning.

earlier at a more prime time Vinny Jones plays a footballer in Mean Machine (CH4 10pm) which isnt all that bad, jason Statham is the tits and the more movies you see him in you more realise that he will be the JCVD of years to come. Seagal as a cook on a boat is Under Seige on E4 with that burd from Baywatch jumping out a cake and Tommy Lee Jones good as the baddie. Fiver (possibly the gayest name for a tv channel ever) has Go at 9pm and its def worth a watch but if you miss it no biggy, these channels show the same pump every couple of days or weeks.

Tuesday 17th is a bit lighter, Drama with her from saved by the bell that got her bits out in Showgirls years ago (what one?) in Student Seduction is on BBC1 at quarter to 2, dunno whether its worth staying up for mind you. Film 2009 is on earlier though it still has Jonathan Ross, not that i dont like him, i do, however i thought the Splice effort at taking over wasnt given the chance it deserves, one mans opinion thats all. The Culture show on BBC2 at 10pm has kermode talking Oscars so thats worth a look.

KickBoxer is on Five USA (renamed from fiveus aas of Monday weirdly) at nine, always wortha look even if your only tuning in back and forward. Silence of the Lambs is on ITV2 too at 10.

Wednesday 18th has sleeping with the Enemy on five at 10pm. I remember this being huge in the 90s, probably is pants though, Julia Roberts as a abused wife and crazy guy who fixes the tins in the cupboard, aye, prob is pants. BBC has there cracking series Movie Connections on tonight and this week its Local Hero. I only watched this for first time a few weeks ago and it is fantastic! So i shall watch this with interest. Bowfinger is worth a look on ITV2.

I should also tell you that Patrick Swayze's new series starts tonight on FiveUSA. Beast its called and thats all i know, but its Swayze as an FBI agent, what can go wrong? BBC4 has Oscar winner Tsotsi from a few years ago. Powerful South African Stuff.

Thursday 19th. Here we go, holy mince film alert, True Identity on BBC1 is an early 90s film starring Lenny Henry at the peak of his popularity, we thought he was Eddie Murphy so we made him play awhite guy and a black guy, genuis. So bad its bad. half 11 is when to get the telly turned over. Apart from that a JCVD double bill on ITV4 from 9pm has Hard Target and Nowhere to run and Five USA kicks off its Will Smith season with Bad Boys II which while not as good as the first one is alright. Word of warning though, it has adverts and was already far too long, this will seem like Once Upon a Time in America with the N word said loads and sunsets galore. God bless Michael Bay.