Morgan Freeman

Morgan Freeman, everyone's favourite old guy in films, has been released from hospital after his big car smash. I'm sure I'm not the only one who when first confronted with the news that he was seriously hurt, he wasn't really, thought,


"Who's going to play that bloke who's awfully like Morgan Freeman in films now?".

You know what I mean, "It's Morgan Freeman as Morgan Freeman as God in Christ Almighty" or whatever. Who else in Hollywood, ne the world, has that essential Morganicity, should the unthinkable happen? Is there really anyone else who can be Morgan Freeman?

Maybe if he does pop it they could give the job to Nelson Mandela, a sort of returning the favour kind of deal after Freeman plays him in the Mandela biopic. "Nelson Mandela as Morgan Freeman as Red in Shawshank Redemption 2: The New Batch" sounds pretty good if you ask me. He can even continue to wear those crackin' shirts and everything!

Oh, and since initial reports indicated that Freeman was so badly injured that he'd soon be bumping into another patriarch he's portrayed I started to thinking who could have replaced him as Mandela had he passed on to that big voiceover recording studio in the sky. May I suggest Aberdeen manager Jimmy Calderwood?


Seriously! "Hey did youse hear I'm gettin' freed the morra? I've dids it boysh" he'd say in his best attempt not to speak like Jimmy Calderwood. And hey, since Freeman and Mandela are both getting on a bit and Aberdeen will no doubt be utter shite, maybe big Jimmy can move over to Hollywood. I mean, he likes the sun!

Picture it; "Jimmy Calderwood as Nelson Mandela as Morgan Freeman as the President of the United States of America in Deep Impact 2: The Armageddon (for real this time)". I smell hit!